When is it Okay to Refuse to Serve Someone Based on Your Religious Beliefs?

Is it okay for a religious person to refuse to bake a cake for a same-sex wedding if they object to same-sex marriage on religious grounds? If it's not, then is it okay for a person to refuse to bake a cake for a religious group that wants "God Hates Fags" written on the cake? I think that no matter which way you go, you're setting a bad precedent, because you can't write laws that favor one group or point of view over another. Because if you're going to compel a conservative religious person to bake a cake for a same-sex marriage, which they believe is a sin, then by the same legal logic you will have to force a gay, or gay-supportive, baker to make a cake that promotes an anti-gay message. It would be difficult to craft a law that makes it illegal for the religious person to deny service to whomever they choose while allowing non-religious people to similarly discriminate.

One argument that I hear fairly often is: "Why would I want to do business with someone who looks down on me?" Frankly, as a consumer, I should have that choice. I can decide that I don't want to do business with Barbie's Biblical Bakery if I hear that they take stands that I find abhorrent, but it's another thing altogether if I show up to order my cake and they decide not to serve me because of their religious beliefs. As a consumer, I should be able to go into any place of business and not be confronted by bigotry against my lifestyle, sexuality, religion (or lack of it), race or anything else. Now, I'm not talking about overt displays of religious belief. I have no problem with a Christian business indicating that they are a business run by Christians, even though there is a good chance that by advertising this, they believe that I am destined for Hell, as long as they keep their opinions to themselves and treat me as any other customer.

I don't know if this can be done legally, but here's what I think would be equitable: make it illegal to refuse to serve someone because they are gay, or refuse to supply a product or service because it will be used in a same-sex wedding. In other words, add "sexual orientation" as a protected class regarding discrimination. If a religious merchant who is against same-sex marriage on religious grounds is asked to participate in a same-sex marriage (e.g. officiant, deejay) or to produce messages (i.e. on a cake) that are clearly designed to offend, or that foment hatred, then they may demur. There have been some conservative Christian groups who have been targeting bakeries run by gays, asking them to bake cakes with anti-gay messages on them (some overt, some more subtle) - clearly being provocative. I have seen accusations that gay rights groups are targeting Christian bakeries in like manner, but haven't seen anything in legitimate media.

Since making this kind of discrimination illegal is either unlikely or will have unpleasant consequenses, let's not rule out the time-honored strategy of the boycott. A local bakery refused to do business with you because of their religious convictions? And it's not illegal? Fine; boycott the heck out of them; shame them on public media; picket their business. Make it plain that you (and anyone who joins you) find their practices to be morally and ethically wrong, despite their legality.

There is more than one way to fight injustice