Thursday, October 1, 2015

Inoffensive Potato Salad

This is my attempt at an inoffensive, non-controversial blog post: my recipe for my world-famous potato salad. Despite my intentions, I realize that it might still end up offending potato salad purists, but so it goes.

You start off, obviously, with potatoes. Yukon Golds probably have the best taste, but Russets work the best for texture. Yukons can get mushier than I want them to...although, after boiling the shit out of them, it probably doesn't make much difference!

The quantities for any of the ingredients depend on how large of a batch you are making, and how much you want the different tastes to stand out. So here we go:


  • Boil the shit out of the potatoes
  • While boiling the potatoes, boil carrots and celery in a separate pot
  • Also while boiling the potatoes, sautee an onion or two. Generally I drizzle some olive oil in a frying pan, toss in the onions and sprinkle black pepper on them. 
(I'm not really sure what the pepper does, but my father cooked very few things, but pepper on onions was one of the things he showed me...unless I dreamed it)

  • Drain the water from the boiled potatoes
  • Do not drain the water from the carrots & celery, pour the whole pot, water and all, over the drained potatoes
  • Dump the sauteed onions over the potatoes
  • Let the liquid from the vegetables soak into the potatoes for...I don't know, how much time do you have?
  • When you feel they have soaked enough...hey! I said I don't know for how long! Drain the liquid out and dump the whole mess into a big bowl
  • Cut up some bell peppers of various colors and toss them in: this adds crunch and color
  • Next, drain the liquid out of a can of corn, preferably white, or white & yellow mix and add the corn
  • Add mayonnaise (no, you may NOT substitute Miracle Whip!) until you get a creamy texture; the amount will vary according to taste and size of the batch
  • I used to add some Doroth Lynch dressing as well, but haven't done this in a while; you can also add poppy seed dressing or whatever you feel adds to the experience
  • Stir
  • I recommend having some while it is hot, but you can let it cool in the refrigerator for later
This comes out a little different every time I make it...it's not so much a recipe, but a process

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