I have become over the years a regular user of social media. I post my photos on various sites, I use Facebook as a soapbox for my political rants and Twitter has become my go-to source for information - or least links to the information. Occasionally I discover an old friend that I had lost track of, and probably never would have reconnected with if it hadn't been for the internet. This, however, is a double-edged sword.
During my time in The Way I met many people who I had not stayed in touch with over the years. Some had left The Way before I did and I, following Way dictates, cut ties with them; others did the same to me when I left The Way. One couple that I rediscovered on Facebook were Mike and Rosemarie. Mike was the best man at my first wedding and was my roommate for about six months before then. Rosemarie was part of the group of four that I was a part of on Way assignment in 1980, and was also my roommate just before I got married. We had stopped talking when my first wife and I had temporarily left The Way in 1983. When we became active again in The Way in 1990 we found that Mike and Rosemarie had joined one of the Way offshoots. By the early 2000's I was out of The Way and so were they. I reached out to them on Facebook, but was quickly told to not have contact with them. Mike noticed a pentacle that I was wearing in my profile picture; they decided that they couldn't be in contact with someone who had rejected Jesus. Mike was also very excited about "studying" the Nephilim in the Old Testament...the kind of thing that I can only describe as the religious version of a conspiracy theory.
Another lesson that I learned on social media is that most people with strong opinions don't want those opinions questioned or challenged. I've always been the kind of person who enjoyed a good discussion, a lively debate, even in the so-called taboo areas of religion and politics. If you want to disagree with me, do it politely, state your case logically and we can still be pals. Yet there is a subset of internet denizens who don't want their own opinions questioned, but are free with their critiques of other people's opinions. Some years ago an in-law regularly took me to task for some of what I posted on Facebook. I promised to take this person's point of view into consideration, but when the tables were turned there was an unwillingness to reciprocate. A family feud, with one of my children refusing to speak to me, continues to this day, even though the in-law in question is no longer an in-law due to divorce.
Although I maintain a policy of inviting civil debate, I have noticed a string of former Facebook "friends" who have disappeared. I can only assume that my strong political posts have run them off. Others, who I know disagree with me, stick with me. Despite being easy going as regards to disagreements I have had to "unfriend" and block several people over the years. Fortunately not too many. The first was another in-law. During the Black Lives Matter protests in 2021 repeatedly made rude comments about the protests. Despite several attempts to get him to phrase his comments in a more civil manner, he persisted and had to be gotten rid of. There was another one just this previous year. One of my best friends from high school, part of a group of guys who I spend virtually all my free time with sent me a friend request. I was thrilled to hear from him. Most of my old teenage years buddies aren't on Facebook and this connection with the past was most welcome. It didn't last long. A retired cop, he quickly revealed himself as a Trumpist and regularly made what I call "drive by postings" - short snarky comments on my posts with no follow up or explanation, even when asked to elaborate on his statements. He got blocked after accusing me of being a sheep because I held the views that I did.
On average through, I find social media to be a positive thing. Sure, there are times when I'm sitting right next to another person and we're both on our phones, scrolling along. But I can honestly say that those are times when I would have been reading a book, or the newspaper, or watching television anyway. Our wedding business does all of its advertising on social media; my photography gets a lot of recognition (and occasional paying gigs) because of social media; I participated for years in an online forum for former members of my old cult. Through social media I have been able to stay in touch with people that I have met at concerts. I can put up with the irritations - the benefits (for me) outweigh them.
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